The Pharaoh's Back In Town

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Tim Stark
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The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by Tim Stark »


Guess who just got back today?
That wild-eyed lad that had been away
Hasn't changed, hasn't much to say
But man, I think I'm pretty great

They were asking if I were around
How I was, where I could be found
Y'all said I was living downtown
Driving Unibot crazy

The Pharaoh's back in town
the Pharaoh's back in town
I said the Pharaoh's back in town
the Pharaoh's back in town...
[hr][/hr]


Hellooooooo Osiris!

Now that you're done reading through what was likely a fairly piss poor adaptation of "The Boys Are Back In Town", I'd like to thank you for electing me three months ago. I know plenty of you were hesitant, a large number of you were certain I'd coup, there was certainly a group concerned that I'd bring Empire back to Osiris, and at least one or two of you expected me to have created a defender autocracy by now. Sorry, doubters, you'll have to keep waiting. I'd much rather be commended than condemned, so couping wouldn't ring well for that would it? Anyways, none of you care about the appetizer, so let's get to the main course. In other words, this is the part where I talk about all the cool things I've done this past term so you can actually support my bid rather than have to accept me by default. So, without further adieu, here's a spiffy list of all the things we've achieved in the past three months, so you can get super excited about the next part, which'll be all the things we can achieve in the next three months.

Tim's list of Osiris Achievements:
  • The Pharaoh's Endorsement Count is hanging around 150 right now, with a steady growth. This is the highest natural endorsement count we've had in OFO's history, and one of the highest in Osiris history.
  • We're friends with people now. Spiritus, The South Pacific, The Pacific, and Lazarus are all good with us again, which is really exciting.
  • We're also friends with The Rejected Realms, who get their own bullet point due to the re-passing of a new and improved Non-Aggression Pact with them.
  • Osiris continues to be Ebola free, meaning more fun in the sun and less death in the shade.
  • The Sekhmet Legion actually exists, and has participated in a fair amount of operations, thanks to the efforts of Festavo. It's only getting better from here, folks!
  • The Court is full, and the Court is capable! Hail the additions of Raven and Zeorus, both of whom know their stuff.
  • The Atef has people, and those people are good. Ainocra and Alexa have both been pretty quality Guardians.
  • The RMB is generally more active, I think. Or, at least, we have fun polls and those are good!
  • We had a foreign update... we should have another one soon, but even having one is exciting.
  • We're still war-free, which is a pretty exciting affair. No intent on starting any wars anytime soon, sorry war hawks.
  • The South Pacific has now bypassed Osiris for the title of "GCR with the most drama". Clutch!
  • Yup, still no Ebola.
That was exciting, wasn't it? Osiris is doing pretty well, so that's cool. Now, it's time to have a list of stuff I plan to do in the next term. Cue list!

Tim's list of to-do things:
  • Be the Sinker Delegate with the most endorsements. We've come this far, we can go even farther.
  • Sekhmet Legion does even more stuff. It'll happen, don't you worry.
  • Continue being drama-free to people want to actually join Osiris and get involved as natives, not subversives.
  • Make more coup jokes, because it seems someone gets really worried any time I do and it's really fun.
  • Monthly Foreign Updates. This one will be tough, but I think it should be doable.
  • Actually have the "Weekly Regional Update" be weekly, rather than... yeah basically monthly right now.
  • More activity, everywhere! Really looking at Culture there, I've got some fun stuff planned.
  • Continue the Fishmonger agenda against the C.A.E.K (Cute but Actually Evil Kittens)
  • Hire more cooks. Because you can never have... too many cooks.
  • Rome theme. I'm not giving up on it. One day... One day.
  • Make more use of our Temples, they're getting dusty.
  • Awards. Some people deserve awards, and they'll get awards.
  • Even more coup jokes.
  • Undoubtedly piss off NES about something. Come on, you know it'll happen.
  • Have the Citizens vote in a non-binding confidence poll on the Pharaoh.

    There you have it. This might be the shortest campaign thread I've had yet. Questions? Comments? Concerns? Bribes? I'm here and I'm waiting for them.
Tim Stark Objectively Osiris' 2nd Best Pharaoh
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Festavo
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The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by Festavo »

Well shit...no war? I WANT WAR!
Just kidding :P

Congratulations Tim on your rather default re-election. I look forward to what you have planned! Oh and the stuff about the Sekhmet Legion doing stuff...yeah that's valid. More to come too!
~Pharaoh Emeritus of the Osiris Fraternal Order~
Spoiler
Revall wrote:: Festavo is an off his rocker cowboy capable of anything at the drop of a hat.
Plagentine wrote:: You got Festavo'd.
Skype Conversation excerpt:
[8:02:13PM] Nuke: but how can you be more dangerous than festavo? now that guy is a real fucking OG
[8:02:46PM] Koth: Are you drunk, Nuke?
Valrifell wrote:God dammit Fest, you think too much!
Koth wrote:I'm a fucking raider, everyone else can blow me.
Spoiler
Jakker
Posts: 461
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 12:00 am

The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by Jakker »

What are your thoughts on the Hedjet's performance last term? Will all of those appointments stay the same?

Could you share more about your ideas for culture? You can save that for your opening address if you were planning on writing one :P

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Zaolat
Posts: 603
Joined: Thu Feb 27, 2014 12:00 am

The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by Zaolat »

"This is OFO-TV News here, at the Pharaoh Tim Stark's inauguration speech. We're now going to ask the Pharaoh himself the question every Osiran wants to know."

*Shoves mic into Tim's face*

"Mr. Pharaohdent, there's a serious issue that hasn't been resolved since the election between Cormac Stark, Zaolat, and Liz Lemons before the Gatesville Coup."

"Will you welcome Liz Lemons back from exilement and allow her to coup the region for the greater good of the OFO?"
Zaolat
The First Pharaoh, Pharaoh Emeritus

Spoiler
Avakael wrote:If the UDL is an NGO, then the LKE is very clearly conducting a war on terrorism. Terrorism perpetuated by the United Defenders League, lead by a man who has shaped his organization to have a culture of wishing to wear tights, live in forests, and possibly even dress up as furries, something which only Todd McCloud may do. I believe this war, therefore, should not be a matter of raiding and defending. It's a matter of moral decency. Don't wear tights. Don't live in forests. Don't dress up and roleplay as animals. It's wrong, and the LKE is taking the initiative to exterminate this horrible organization.
<+Zaolat> you know I hear if a man eats lots of pineapples and it's juice good things happen
<+Xoriet> :D
<+Xoriet> Awesome
<@Venico> Sigged
<+Xoriet> VENICO
<+Zeorus> XD
<@Venico> Xoriet! <3
<+Xoriet> I meant Nox's Nether Faerie Dragon ;x;
<@Venico> Uh huh, Sure
<+Xoriet> I didn't even see Zao's thing
<+Xoriet> ;x;
<+Xoriet> I hate you all
<@Venico> Nope
<@Venico> That's copyright
<@Venico> Night Father TM
<@Treize_Dreizehn> <Xoriet> I didn't even see Zao's thing <--- That's what she said.
<@Treize_Dreizehn> my work here is done
<@Venico> Did the pineapple improve it Xoriet?
<+Xoriet> Now I really hold deep loathing for all of you ={
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War Wombat
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Joined: Mon Jan 27, 2014 12:00 am

The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by War Wombat »

Congrats on the start of your second term. I hope that its even better than the first.

EDIT: Zao, who are you talking about?
"As a marsupial, you provide the insult"

-TAO


Spoiler


Former Titles:
Spoiler
Keeper of the Deshret
Vizier of Osiris
Scribe of Culture
Assistant Director of the Diplomatic Service of Osiris
Ambassador of Osiris to The North Pacific
Ambassador of Osiris to the South Pacific (possibly)
Member of the Balder Riksdag
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Joshua Bluteisen
Posts: 447
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The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by Joshua Bluteisen »

I'll give you a potato if you make good on the Rome theme.
Resident Angry Old Person of the Osiris Fraternal Order
House Bluteisen
Axis of Evil on EsperNet & SwiftIRC || ygfbv on ColdFront <Zeorus> because we're not all smart like you, Axis
<Zeorus> some of us have the privilege of being dumb ;_;
Spoiler
Patriarch of House Bluteisen
Owner of the New Galactic Empire forum
Legionnaire of the Sekhmet Legion & Soldier of the Imperial Sovereign Realms Army
Red Guard of the New Galactic Empire
Holder of the Scale of Ma'at
Holder of the Seal of Vigilance
Spoiler
Medjai Guardsman
Vizier of the Osiris Fraternal Order
Marshal General of the Sekhmet Legion
Sepatarch of the 7th Sepatarchy of the Kemetic Republic of Osiris
Acting-Pharaoh of the Osiris Fraternal Order
Osiran Atef
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Zaolat
Posts: 603
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The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by Zaolat »

Joshua Bluteisen wrote:Tue Mar 31, 2015 12:21 amI'll give you a potato if you make good on the Rome theme.
No, fuuuucgk that. Makedonian.
Zaolat
The First Pharaoh, Pharaoh Emeritus

Spoiler
Avakael wrote:If the UDL is an NGO, then the LKE is very clearly conducting a war on terrorism. Terrorism perpetuated by the United Defenders League, lead by a man who has shaped his organization to have a culture of wishing to wear tights, live in forests, and possibly even dress up as furries, something which only Todd McCloud may do. I believe this war, therefore, should not be a matter of raiding and defending. It's a matter of moral decency. Don't wear tights. Don't live in forests. Don't dress up and roleplay as animals. It's wrong, and the LKE is taking the initiative to exterminate this horrible organization.
<+Zaolat> you know I hear if a man eats lots of pineapples and it's juice good things happen
<+Xoriet> :D
<+Xoriet> Awesome
<@Venico> Sigged
<+Xoriet> VENICO
<+Zeorus> XD
<@Venico> Xoriet! <3
<+Xoriet> I meant Nox's Nether Faerie Dragon ;x;
<@Venico> Uh huh, Sure
<+Xoriet> I didn't even see Zao's thing
<+Xoriet> ;x;
<+Xoriet> I hate you all
<@Venico> Nope
<@Venico> That's copyright
<@Venico> Night Father TM
<@Treize_Dreizehn> <Xoriet> I didn't even see Zao's thing <--- That's what she said.
<@Treize_Dreizehn> my work here is done
<@Venico> Did the pineapple improve it Xoriet?
<+Xoriet> Now I really hold deep loathing for all of you ={
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Tim Stark
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The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by Tim Stark »

Lemon Love wrote:What are your thoughts on the Hedjet's performance last term? Will all of those appointments stay the same?

Could you share more about your ideas for culture? You can save that for your opening address if you were planning on writing one :P
I think the Hedjet has done well, overall, and I at least thought it looked more active. All appointments will not be staying the same, though due to personal wishes from Hedjeti rather than any specific individuals lacking in performance. More on that in a few days, via my inauguration speech as well as the appointments that I've got to present to the Deshret, as I don't believe we managed to amend that part out.

Ideas of culture.... I'll save that for the opening address, both because I want to and because I need to make sure my ideas make sense. I'm not a Culture person, really. :P
OFO-TV wrote:"Will you welcome Liz Lemons back from exilement and allow her to coup the region for the greater good of the OFO?"
Nah.
Axis wrote:I'll give you a potato if you make good on the Rome theme.
Sure.
Tim Stark Objectively Osiris' 2nd Best Pharaoh
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shetef
Diplomat
Diplomat
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The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by shetef »

Are you opposed to me making the other two Elders fight to the death if I ever become Chief Elder?
nobody of consequence
Jakker
Posts: 461
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2015 12:00 am

The Pharaoh's Back In Town

Post by Jakker »

Thank you for answers and I look forward to your opening address!
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