Wepet Renpet- The Osiris 'Legit' Recipe Competition

[Dragonian Alliance]

Greetings Osiris,

It is Wepet Renpet, so to celebrate we are making a cook book of 'legit' recipes, worthy of being in the Osiris Oracle. The winner of the competition will be the recipe that causes my wife to most question there sanity.

1. You can submit the recipe in any format you wish.

2. It has to technically be edible and a recipe you have tried or found.

3. Nothing that will get you banned, use your judgement.

[Malphe]

I'll concede I don't actually have any gigacursed recipes to share, but he's a very quick recitement of the Risotto recipe I've been using for the last few days.

INGREDIENTS

500g-ish arborio rice
700ml-ish chicken stock
A tablespoon or two double cream
Handful of grated pecorino romano cheese
Diced onion
Some two dozen mushrooms, sliced or diced
Some prawns
Finely diced or crushed garlic

1. Olive oil into pan up to a medium/medium-low heat, onions, mushrooms, garlic in. We're doing these together because they release a lot water while cooking, you'll find the water they release builds up at the base of the pan and prevents frying for a while until it evaporates.

2. Once the water is all evaporated and you can hear that the ingredients are crackling again, in go the prawns. Fry those with the rest of the vegetables for a few minutes, maybe.

3. Once the prawns and mushrooms look decently cooked, in goes your rice to be toasted. Stir the rice regularly while it's frying or it'll stick to the pan and be a bitch to scrape off.

4. Once you're satisfied with the rice in goes chicken stock, high heat on the pan, you're actually cooking the rice now. You'll want to cook it until it's still got a slight bite to it, think like al dente for pasta. Don't be afraid to put more water in or take water out if it doesn't look like it'll cook right, you want there to be just enough water that the rice is fully cooked while suspended in a creamy stock. The starch thickens the stock you're boiling this in.

5. Once the rice is fully cooked, keep it on heat for another minute while you empty in the cream and grated pecorino. The pecorino in particular is where the flavour of this comes from, any other hard italian pasta cheese like it will work nicely so long as it has a sharp and strong flavour. Once it's all melted in, serve! It should taste strong and rich, this is an extremely dense and filling meal that I've been having a lot of fun experimenting with over the last weekish.

[Sygian]

Hmm okay, I will submit one of my favorite recipes that I started using recently. I am a big meal prepper, especially for breakfast, because if there's one thing that I don't have time for before work in the morning... it is making breakfast. This is a very basic recipe, though does take about an hour for prepping + cooking. Trust me, it's worth it.

I present to you...

Spoiler

Makes 7 burritos
Ingredients:

• 1 lb of protein (this can be ham, sausage, turkey, whatever breakfast meat you prefer. I usually go with ham, but like to switch it up sometimes)
• 1 green bell pepper
• 1 yellow onion
• 7 burrito size tortillas
• Shredded cheese
• 12 eggs
• Olive oil (I don't know how much, a splash?
• Slap Ya Mama seasoning (or whatever you prefer, but trust me this stuff is bomb

Steps:

1. Dice the green bell pepper and yellow onion. Set aside.
2. Cook your protein. If you are using something like a ham steak, make sure it is cut up enough for breakfast burrito purposes. Set aside the cooked meat, but if you're like me, leave the yummy juices in the pan.
3. Cook the diced bell pepper and onion together in the meat juices. You'll know when they're cooked enough when they get kinda brown and the onions become a bit translucent. Set these aside in the separate bowl from the meat.
4. Whisk 12 eggs in a bowl. Your choice if you want to add seasoning now or while they're cooking. Throw those in the pan, and scramble them. The key here is to not cook them fully, leave them a little wet. Set aside
5. Set out your 7 tortillas. Divide the bowl of meat, veggies, and eggs evenly between all 7 tortillas. Try to keep everything at the bottom half of the burrito.
6. Sprinkle as much cheese on top as you'd like
7. Now, time to fold. If you've never folded a burrito in your life, don't panic. The best way to do it is to lift up the bottom of the burrito over the contents (remember, they're at the bottom half of the burrito), and tuck the sides in while you roll. DON'T BE AFRAID TO GET YOUR HANDS DIRTY! Your first couple tries may not be perfect, or may not even work! But don't get frustrated, it will come naturally once you get the hang of it.
8. Wrap the burritos in saran wrap and keep in freezer.
9. Make sure to put one burrito in the refrigerator the night before to thaw.
10. To cook from thawed, put in microwave for about a minute and a half. To cook from frozen, idk, maybe toss it on defrost/thaw for a bit in the microwave. Just thaw the night before. So much easier.
11. Enjoy!

Spoiler

[Cretanja]

Slop Ramen Bowl

Ingredients

• 1 pack of ramen instant noodles

• 2 eggs

• Pickles ( as desired )

• 4 slices of cheese ( American or Cheddar )

• Seasonings such as: Salt, Pepper, and Tajin

---

Instructions

Put some eggs in a pot and fill it halfway with water. Sprinkle some salt into the water and put the pot on your stove top with the intentions of bringing the water to a boil. Allow the eggs to boil in the water for 12 to 15 minutes. Prepare a separate pot of water on the stove top and wait until water begins to boil. Once water comes to a boil, carefully drop in your block of Ramen Instant Noodles. ( CAREFUL - THIS WILL BE EXTREMELY HOT ) Place the packet of seasoning on the side. While waiting for the ramen and eggs, get out your desired amount of dill flavoured pickles and chop them up liberally. Put your chopped pickles aside, and prepare a microwave safe bowl with four slices of American or Cheddar sliced cheese ( though any type of cheese will do, really ). Fill the bowl with water just enough to cover the cheese slices and pop it into the microwave for however long it takes for the cheese to melt - you may need to remove it and stir it a couple times before the water and cheese fully mix. ( CAREFUL - THIS WILL BE EXTREMELY HOT ) Set this aside, and remove your eggs from the stovetop, carefully draining the hot water, and refilling the pot with cold water from the tap. You may need to repeat this step a few times. Remove your Ramen from the stovetop and carefully drain it of the hot water as well, and instantly throw the drained Ramen into the bowl with the melted cheese and mix well. Set this aside. Return to your now boiled and cooled eggs, and remove their shells. Once removed, rinse them so as to fully remove any eggshell debris that may remain. Cut your boiled eggs into your desired chunks. Place cut up eggs and pickles into your Cheesy Ramen and then add your seasonings. I recommend added salt, pepper, and light dash of Tajin.. mix well, and enjoy!

[Durm]

McDonalds fries with salt

Ingredients:

McDonalds fries
Salt

Steps:

1. Buy fries from McDonalds
2. Add salt
3. Repeat 2. as many times as you like or want
4. Enjoy

[Maadi]

I'm going to buck the trend a bit and go for contributing to the part of the cookbook that has the fun stuff that may, according to urban legend, drive someone a bit mad, as well as pay tribute to a recent NS mainstay that we've worked alongside in the past who has suddenly departed.

Maadi's MT Army Mule

What you'll need:

• 1 fl oz Pernod Absinthe
• 1 fl oz lime juice (freshly squeezed)
• 4 fl oz ginger beer
• a splash of angostura bitters

Serve in: a vintage goblet from an antique or thrift store. Mine was made by the Specialty Glass Co. of East Liverpool, Ohio. Alternatively: a rocks glass.

Method:
1. Squeeze your lime juice into your serving glass, then drop in the spent lime (alternatively: withhold to garnish)
2. Add 3 crushed ice cubes, the absinthe, and then cold ginger beer, in that order
3. Add a splash of the bitters to taste
4. Stir gently and serve with stirring rod

Makes one serving. Enjoy responsibly!

[Phoebe]

BB's Spearmint Mojito

Spoiler

Mojitos are tasty and fairly easy-to-make. I use spearmint that I grow myself in my recipe.

Ingredients

• 4 - 5 medium to large spearmint leaves
• 0.5 oz of a simple sugar syrup
• 0.75 oz of lime juice
• 2 oz white rum
• 3 large ice cubes
• Club soda

Equipment

• 1 Old fashioned glass (or any glass for that matter. I just find that an old fashioned glass is easier to use)
• 1 muddler (or a small spoon)

Instructions

1. Wash the spearmint leaves, then add them and the simple syrup to your glass.
2. Muddle the spearmint to release its oils
3. Add the lime juice, rum, and ice cubes. Add club soda to top.
4. Stir and enjoy!